Tuesday, February 28, 2017

I Wish I Was The One

I guess that answers the question;
I ought to be relieved.
Instead I feel as though
There's a giant hole in me.
How do I move on?
Now what do I say?
I don't want to leave,
But I have to go away.
I swear I'm happy for you;
I'm just crying for me.
I told myself we were just friends,
But that's not what I wanted to be.
I should have said something
A long, long time ago,
But would it have made a difference
If I'd let you know?
You love someone else,
And I hope that it goes well...
Even though right now,
I'm not taking it too well.
I want to keep on talking;
I don't want to say goodbye.
But I'll always wonder what if,
And I don't think that's right.
I shouldn't be surprised;
I knew this day would come.
Why am I in shock?
I wish I was the one.

Thursday, February 23, 2017


Writers that don't write;
Singers that don't sing.
Actors in coffee shops;
Musicians on the street.
Blockades never hurdled;
Turns down different streets.
Resolutions never kept;
Goals never reached.
Bookmarks you never open;
Numbers you never call.
Notebooks you never fill;
Projects that you stall.
You had such big ideas;
They sparkled and they shined.
The future looks so different
Than it did when you were nine.
That thing you thought you'd do
You start to think you can't;
You always say tomorrow,
But you haven't got a plan.
Everyone's asking questions,
And all you do is dodge.
That career that you'd imagined
Was only a mirage.
The older that you get,
The smaller that you feel;
You forget what's only in your head,
And what is really real.
Sometimes people make it;
They become who they meant to be.
But most of the time,
Dreamers only dream.

Friday, February 3, 2017


If you saw this post before, you may notice that it has been edited slightly. I apologize. This is one I originally posted on my facebook page, and when I copy and pasted it, I accidentally left off several lines. It's better now.

At the back of my mind, something's sitting,
Scratching, tickling, poking, itching;
I walk in, and out again,
Trying to find out what it is.
Something's stirring; something's wrong.
Something won't leave me alone.
Something thinks the night is day;
Some dark thought won't go away.
Something stirs within the cave;
Something howls, something raves.
Something's jumping up and down,
Spinning, chasing, running round.
It won't sit still for me to see;
Something won't just let me be.
Something laughs; something grins;
Something attacks from within.
How can I lose my enemy,
If it lives inside of me?
It slithers, crawls, creeps, and climbs;
It stares at me with bloodshot eyes.
Something, something is amiss,
But I don't know just what it is.
If I don't look, will it leave,
Or will it only scream at me?
I'd write it down; I'd let it go,
But what it is, I just don't know.
Why does it hiss and spit at me?
Something makes poor company.
On my heart, something's weighing;
Something's bleating, something's braying.
Something's keeping me from peace;
Something won't grant me release.
Something's tearing me apart;
Something, show me what you are.
If I can't get this off my chest,
Then I will never feel at rest.
Lord, all I want, and all I need,
Is for you to finally grant me peace.

When I'm Feeling Well...

Climbing up,
Falling down,
Feeling lonely
In a crowd.
Awake at night,
Tired all day,
Talk too much,
Nothing to say.
Don't look left,
Don't look right,
Don't let strangers
Catch my eye.
Ugly truths,
Pretty lies,
Empty hellos,
Hard goodbyes.
Cups of coffe,
Sticky chair,
Blank expression,
Like I don't care.
Don't ask me,
I'll never tell,
That's when I
Am feeling well.
Can I do it?
If I must.
I don't dare
Put up a fuss.
Lord Jesus,
Jesus Christ,
I swear that I
Believe in you,
But I don't know
If that's true.
What the Hell
Does "peace" mean?
Is that
A real thing?
I don't know;
I give up.
Should I say uncle,
Or enough?
To get to
To get to You,
You told me
I needed fruit.
I don't have
A single thing
That you haven't given me.
Do you want
My weary soul?
My heavy eyes,
My aching bones?
My darkened thoughts,
My bleeding heart?
Please take them.
Here they are.


People with the wrong people,
Because at least it's not alone.
People with the wrong people,
Because there's nowhere else to go.
People with the wrong people;
They think that's what they deserve.
Someone who doesn't love them,
Because who would have the nerve?
People with the wrong people,
Because they feel trapped.
How did they get into this?
How do you get out of that?
People hurting people,
Because they know they can.
People hurting people,
Because they have the upper hand.
Because they're hurt, or angry;
They don't want to look afraid.
People hurting people,
Just to make them stay.
Does it break your heart?
Does it make you cry?
Or do you feel so lonely,
That you envy their life?
People chasing people,
Blind to the people chasing them;
People catching people,
And letting them go again.
People breaking hearts,
Because they don't know how to stay;
Maybe someone who they trusted
Just disappeared one day.
People who have no one,
But wish with all their soul
That someone would love them,
And would finally let them know.
You'd think there'd be a limit
To the kinds of pain,
But pain is not as simple,
As "check one: snow, or rain?"