My Mind Is Playing Tricks On Me

My mind is playing tricks on me.

Its lies sound like reality;

The echo of a demon

Who once whispered in my ear.

My mind is playing tricks on me.

I try so hard not to believe; 

Anxiety comes knocking 

And it always finds me here.

My mind is playing tricks on me.

It's telling me you're gonna leave,

Even though the evidence

Has never been more clear. 

My mind is playing tricks on me.

It's trying to belittle me. 

That voice had gotten quiet 

But it never disappeared. 

Promise

I feel like I'm losing you

And I can't get you back;

It doesn't matter what I do,

You don't want what we have.

I try to fill the silence,

But it only goes one way,

And eventually I know

I'll run out of things to say.

There was a time you told me

That you loved me more;

Now I'm feeling desperate,

And you're one foot out the door.

I used to be afraid

That someday you would leave;

The confidence I'd finally found

Will be the death of me.

I keep listening to Migraine

Like this song could understand,

But it can't fill the empty space

Between my hand and your hand.

I just want to stop crying.

I'm not just a mistake.

I'm clinging to the hope

There's a promise you won't break...

Dorian

 Like the infamous Dorian 

I watch my spirit change;

Through a tapestry of messages

I am rearranged.

From seventeen and crying

To a happy little wife,

A string of words paints

The portrait of my life.

It might be unhealthy

But I reread the words,

Trying to understand;

Trying to learn. 

This creature is foreign;

She says things I would never,

And yet I am her,

Only I'm better.

Beautiful Girls

 Beautiful girls 

Crying on scales

The picture of health

But feeling like whales

Putting on smiles

Saying they're fine

Skipping the meals

They need to survive 

Beautiful girls 

Broken like clay

Bodies used

Hearts thrown away

Staying strong

But not silent

Saving beautiful girls 

From future violence

House & Home

 You make it look easy

While I'm falling apart

I just wish I was

Half the mom you are.

I hide these tears,

But the tears still come;

I live in a house,

But you make yours a home.

I live in a house,

But you make yours a home.

You make it look easy,

The way that you smile.

It's clear that they love you.

Can I stay here awhile?

I have a family,

But I feel so alone.

I live in a house,

But it's not a home.

I live in a house,

But I want to come home.

Like A Glove

 Maybe if I change myself

Maybe if I'm someone else

Maybe if I rearrange,

Don't contradict, don't complain;

If I make myself fit like a glove,

Then maybe I'll be good enough.

Maybe if I hate myself,

Put my voice up on a shelf,

Maybe if I just agree,

Bend to your will, silently;

If I make myself fit like a glove,

Then maybe I'll be good enough.

Maybe if I lost some weight;

Maybe if I never ate.

Do my makeup, do my hair,

Let you tell me what to wear.

If a size 2 fits me like a glove,

Then maybe I'll be good enough.